Category: People

Social Stuff

A Simple Tip for Socialising while Travelling Solo (or How to Have Mind Blowing Nights Out when you’re on your Own)

Post author By Vinay
Post date May 3, 2015
9 Comments on A Simple Tip for Socialising while Travelling Solo (or How to Have Mind Blowing Nights Out when you’re on your Own)

Travelling alone is one of the best things I’ve ever done. It opened my eyes to both the external world and internally into my own personality and mind.

One of the changes I had to quickly adapt to was that if I wanted any type of human interaction I had to go out and find it. Moving about constantly means you need to be able to make friends quickly or else you may find yourself eating dinner alone, which is no fun.

While there are hundreds of ways you can go about meeting people while travelling, with hanging out in a hostel being one of the easiest, I want to share a simple strategy that I used all the time in every country with a 90% success rate (I just made up that number but it basically works all the time). It’s also a strategy you can use if you are staying in a nicer hotel or on a business trip so don’t worry if you don’t plan on going backpacking any time soon.

The Bar Strategy

Sounds like a pretty unique strategy right? Just read…

If you’re travelling on your own (even if you’re in your own city really) and feel like meeting someone new and not spending the evening alone, here is what you do. Spend your day sightseeing or in your meetings. While you’re going about during the day look out for bars that you feel are your kind of style. When I say a bar, I mean a place with a bar. Not a lounge, not a club and not a beer garden. You want somewhere that has an actual bar, around the bar tender area with stools you can go and sit on. Plus they should serve food. If you see a place during the day, pop in quickly and chat to the bar tender.

You: “Hey, I’m new in town and looking for somewhere to hang out tonight, what’s this place like?
BT: Its good / Its bad.
*If it seems like somewhere cool that you could hang out at, and it seems like it gets a little busy follow up with this.*
You: Awsome, sounds cool. I think I’ll head back here later. Thanks so much for helping me out. What’s your name?
BT: No problems, I’m Julie.
You: Julie, nice to meet you. I’m Vinay. Are you going to be working tonight?
BT: Nah, I finish at three.
You: Ahh, too bad. I wanted to see you again so I could give you a HUGE tip for helping me out. Do you know who is going to be working tonight?
BT: Yeh its Dave I think.
You: Dave hey, what does he look like?
BT: (blah bla description)
You: Ok cool. Thanks again Julie, it was nice talking to you. I may see you again tomorrow.

What you have just done there is properly sussed out a venue. It’s only a 1 min conversation but if you jump into 5 different bars throughout your daily venturing, it can seriously help out the quality of your night. Plus, now you have something to talk about when you go back in later. It works just as well if the bartender is still going to be working that evening.

Come back into the bar, ideally earlyish. 6 or 7. With the plan to eat dinner and get a few drinks (or not if you don’t drink). Sit down at the bar, in the middle of the bar. Next to other people and ideally near the section where people come and buy drinks. Strike up a conversation with Dave telling him how you met Julie earlier. Tell him you’re new into town or on holiday. Ask him what is happening in the area tonight. Talk LOUD (but not obnoxiously) so that others in the bar can hear your conversation and contribute. As soon as you get chatting with the people next to you, introduce yourself. Find out what they’re up to (if they’re staying for a few or about to leave is all you need to know). If they’re staying for a while, offer to buy them a drink straight away. Don’t worry, you will get one back. Tip the bartender big the first time.

You now have a whole bar full of friends. When people (read girls) come up to the bar to order their drinks, bring them into your conversation. Introduce the girls to the bartender and to your new friends. Can you see the snowballing effects here?

Don’t worry if the bar isn’t the coolest place in the world. You can always move on later in the night. Also, don’t worry if you don’t get a chance to check it out during the day. If its fairly busy and has a bar, it still works fine.

I can’t tell you how many crazy nights I have had that have started off in this exact manner. I’ve ended up being taken out by the bar tenders, the people next to me and the girls that walk up. To all sorts of crazy places, in different countries. You never know where you’ll end up.

As a closing rule, if you are travelling and out to experience. Try Do not to say no to anything. If some old dude invites you to his kids birthday: Yes. If two seedy guys invite you to a strip club: Yes. If two beautiful girls invite you back to their place…

Life can be awesome if you let it.

Tags life, networking, People, social, socialising, Travel

Business Featured People Technology Travel

99 Abstract Life Hacks – Make your Life Easier Today!

Post author By Vinay
Post date May 1, 2012
2 Comments on 99 Abstract Life Hacks – Make your Life Easier Today!

Business People

Outsourcing Revisited – What I’ve Learned Since 2010

Post author By Vinay
Post date April 9, 2012
No Comments on Outsourcing Revisited – What I’ve Learned Since 2010

* caveat – this post is from the perspective of a small business owner who does not have full time managers and human resource specialists. Someone who doesn’t have systems and processes in place to manage large collaborative teams on long term projects. This is for someone managing a small team with limited resources and need work done in the most efficient and effective manner possible.

A while back a wrote a post called 4 Tips to Not Get Screwed on Elance which has gained some controversy and even some backlash from the Elance community, mostly from freelancers who wrote me up as some type of slave driver.

Well, since that post more than 2 years ago, I have clocked up A LOT more experience with Elance, oDesk and a bunch of other outsourcing sites. I have had many full time, part-time and freelancer staff and have learned a bunch more since I wrote that post.

First things first.

I completely stand by everything I wrote in the first post, and think it is excellent advice to cover your own ass. I understand this might irritate some people, but the fact of the matter is those people probably haven’t put up their own hard earned money onto a site only to had it flushed down the drain buy someone in another continent.

Of course, I would prefer to be able to put up a nice fluffy ad, sign little hearts above my i’s and frolic around a paddock while my work gets done, my business grows and my cash flow is controlled. Unfortunately I don’t live in a fairy tale and shit happens.

Even after I wrote that post, I have still had many disturbing experiences with outsourcing sites. Mostly from NOT following my own advice. I’ve had many delayed, disregarded, over priced and under delivered projects, again and again.

In fact, I have come to the basic rule that 50% of all outsourcing hires are going to fail within the first week. Please read that stat again, because it’s RIDICULOUS compared to a normal business.

Even guys I know who are based in the Philippines and have staff in house in their own office, think that a 66% stick rate after 1 week is doing well.

With these kinds of figures as an employer, it only makes sense that you need to be much tighter in not only your hiring process, but you project schedules, time tracking and more.

I am not running a start up in SF. I cant hire a few college grads, give them Mac Books and iPhones and expect them to sleep under their desk every night. Its hard enough getting virtual staff to show up everyday.

After my additional experience with virtual staff, there are a number of things I have learned. I will go into screening these concepts in later posts, but here are my 2 biggest takeaways:

1. Communication skills, Communication skills, Communication skills, Communication skills repeat etc...

Communication skills are EVERYTHING when dealing with virtual staff. Since you have no way of directly managing them, if they are a poor communicator, chances are your project is going to fall through before it even starts.

This should be your key screening metric during interviews, technical skills, processes and tasks can all be learned. But someone that doesn’t know how to do something, and never tells you that don’t know how to do it, is where everything falls down.

I will do a whole post if not multiple posts on screening communication skills.

2. Work Ethic / Current Situation / Motivation

Whatever you want to call it. We used to just call it “current situation” basically what it means is WHY does this person want this job? Do they NEED it? Are they EXCITED by the project? Will this be their primary focus? Do they already have multiple other clients and projects that are of higher commitment than your project? How much do those projects pay? What proximity and level of commitment will the worker commit to your project?

These are all questions that need to be asked when making the hire.

I have studied human resources and organisational structure and I completely understand this is not modern, traditional or textbook way of approaching, hiring or managing staff in a traditional business.

But outsourced work is not traditional business. Ideally you want to create a collaborative culture or a fun working environment, but a REQUIREMENT is to get the job done in the most cost effective manner and thus the process becomes much more transactional.

With all the above being said, that doesn’t mean once you hire someone who you work well with you can’t empower them. On the contrary you should, but just make sure you screen thoroughly before relaxing on management techniques.

Tags Business, elance, odesk, People, virtual assistant, virtual staff

People

Discovery vs Debate – A Tale of Two Conversationalists

Post author By Vinay
Post date November 22, 2011
No Comments on Discovery vs Debate – A Tale of Two Conversationalists

Have you ever gotten into a discussion with someone and had it feel like a wonderful journey of discovery, where both of you were bouncing off each other, teaching, learning and debating yes; but growing together with the conversation?

What about a discussion where right off the bat it gets straight into a heated debate, where one person is certain that the other is wrong and instead of tying to discover the truth, they are trying to force their opinion?

Have you noticed that the same people initiate the same type of conversation over and over?

I’m not saying this is a hard and fast rule. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from meeting thousands of people all around the world it’s that:

You can never be 100% when dealing with humans.

That being said, there are patterns that form from interacting with enough people and this is one of those patters.

Which type of person do you prefer to interact with?

Which type of person are you?

Tags conversation, life, networking, People

People Travel

Just say YES! And a Tattoo!

Post author By Vinay
Post date February 18, 2011
16 Comments on Just say YES! And a Tattoo!

For the last year or so I have been trying to live my life much like the Yes Man (you know that good book by that guy and the crappy movie with Jim Carrey). It’s amazing what can happen in your life if you just say yes.

There are a whole bunch of quotes I could pull to this argument and I have talked about the importance of decision making in the past. Men (and women) should make decisions and that decision should be yes – most of the time anyway. And once you say yes, you need to DO IT, and DO IT GOOD!

Take my last 2 years for example.

I made the decision to quit my job and travel. I then made a decision to make money while I travel. I travelled all over the world (South East Asia, Europe and North America) while making money and having all sorts of crazy experiences which I loved. While I was in Canada, I made a decision to enter the Shoemoney Contest which I won controversially and lead me to Vegas. In Vegas I met Adolfo Salazar who I now work for. I met Shoemoney and DK who are great guys. I moved to Tempe, Arizona to work with Adolfo for a couple of months, I then plan to spend Summer in Costa Rica.

This is life in Tempe:

In March I am going to Vegas for Lead Con, Austin for SXSW, Lake Havasu for Spring Break and Miami for Ultra Music Festival.

While I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t decide to say yes, I also wouldn’t be here if I didn’t have support and help of others. Such as my uncle in Vancouver, Adolfo and Jeremy Schoemaker. Humans are social creatures and we progress much faster when we work together (something many internet marketers don’t embrace). Relationships are everything. Relationships are created through commonalities and shared experiences and are maintained through loyalty and trust. And because I promised to get a Shoemoney tattoo if I won the contest AND the black jack hand here it is….

Now that’s Abstract Living…

And thanks again Jeremy, my life has changed directions (once more) thanks to you.

People

The Secret to Eternal Youth – Play the Game of Life (It’s Actually a Game not a Metaphor)

Post author By Vinay
Post date November 15, 2010
2 Comments on The Secret to Eternal Youth – Play the Game of Life (It’s Actually a Game not a Metaphor)

The Game of Life is an awesome game. I’ve been playing it for a couple of years now but have slowed down since I started travelling. I managed a few decent sessions in Budapest but you really need to know people (usually) for longer than a few hours to get them to join in on the fun.

So what is the Game of Life?

The game of life is a game, where in once you join the game, you have to play it for the rest of your life. Hence the name…

The game rules are as follow:

If someone who is also playing the game of life asks you a question, any question at all, at any point in time, for any reason, and within your response to the question you use the word ‘mine’ you have to drop and do 10 push ups. Right then and there.

Here are some examples:

Simple foolery:

Hey, who’s beer is that?

Mine

Haha get down!

Ego rubber:

Wow, this place is awesome. I love that xyz thing. Who’s idea was it to come here?

Mine

Haha get down!

Advanced trickery:

What is the name of that bomb thing between that blows up when you step on it? They have them between North and South Korea…

Land mine?

Haha get down!

As you can see, it’s pretty straight forward.

The game can get very deceptive and seeing how it is played 24/7 you can really catch people at inappropriate times.

The game is the secret to eternal youth because its a constant reminder to always have fun. To be juvenile. To not take things so seriously. Failed attempts, triumphant successes and harsh defeats will all bring a smile to your face.

Maybe not while you’re doing push ups in a fancy bar wearing a suit, maybe not while you’re half way through a conversation with a cute girl and you get done, maybe not after you’ve been woken in the middle of the night, asked a question then forced to do push ups. But you will eventually smile.

And with that smile, you will remember the good times. With that smile you will realise there are still more to come.

I’m very young, but I hope I never stop playing The Game of Life.

You shouldn’t take life to seriously. You’ll never get out alive. Van Wilder

Tags games, life, motivation, People, self improvement, story, youth

People

Are You a Decision Making Douche?

Post author By Vinay
Post date November 12, 2010
2 Comments on Are You a Decision Making Douche?

My latest and faviouritest book is Psycho Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz. I have the audio version and am on my third listen. Which is no small feat as it’s a monstrous book.

The book is crazy famous and has been used by countless athletes, actors, CEOs, entrepreneurs, coaches etc…

For those who don’t know, Psycho Cybernetics is the father of self help books. Its topics include self image, emotional state, action quota, decision making, success mechanisms, happiness, visualisation and I don’t even know what else. It is literally like 5 books in one. Each time I have listened to it, it has been like whole book of new information.

It is one of those books that will resonate with you differently depending on where in life you are. This is why I think so many people go through it multiple times. It’s like reading a different book the next time around.

One of the topics that stuck with me this time around was the topic of decision making. I wrote here how important decisions are and how much of a dramatic impact they can have on your life.

Maxwell Maltz goes into decision making in great detail. Here are some of the takeaways:

Making a decision

Making a decision is incredibly important. While you should use the information you have to assess the pros and cons of a decision you should not dwell on it too long. Decisiveness is one of the strongest traits of any leader and is a key hiring characteristic for management in the corporate world. Being able to quickly come to a decision, act on it and have others follow you creates motion instead of stagnation. Motion is the breeding ground for innovation, creativeness, success and happiness. Stagnation is the breading ground of doubt, lethargy, boredom and depression.

If you are thinking about doing something, decide if you are going to do it or not, then act on your decision.

Locking away the Decision

This brings me to the next point. Locking away a decision. Once you have made a decision, you need to lock it away in the ‘lock box’ as so famously quoted by US Vice President Al Gore. There is no use worrying or stressing over whether or not you made a correct decision after you have made that decision. Once the decision is made, you should completely detach yourself from the outcome of the decision and just work on taking action. All analysis and concern should be done before the decision is made, not after.

If you spend time thinking about whether or not the decision was the correct one is that going to help you achieve your goal?

No.

Worrying and stressing about the ‘correctness’ of your decision is a stupid waste of time, energy and emotional state.

Making the Correct Decision

In his lectures to business leaders, Maltz quotes a few cogent remarks from his attendees:

“Dr. Maltz, the truth is that there are few inherently right decisions or wrong decisions. Instead, we make decisions, then make them right. That’s what leadership is all about.”

“You can always correct a poor decision, but if you do nothing, you can never get the time back.”

As stated above, worrying about whether your decision was the right one or not is not only stupid, but it increases the chances that the decision will end up as the wrong one.

If you decide to start a project, but spend all your days worrying if it will be successful or not instead of working hard to create the output necessary to complete the project, you are creating the result of a poor decision.

Whereas if you had decided you are going to start a project and work five hours a day for the next two weeks on it and not worry whether or not it will be successful, you are creating the results of a completed project which has a higher chance of being the correct decision.

You can significantly alter the outcome of your decision helping to determine its success factor.

Moral of the story

If you’re thinking about doing something, decide and move on. If it turns out you made the wrong decision, make a new decision and move on. Don’t stay in a state of limbo and don’t worry about if you are making the correct decision. Worst case scenario you fail. Who gives a fuck! NEXT.

Tags Book, books, life, motivation, People, personal development, Productivity

People Technology

Abstract Education: The Khan Academy

Post author By Vinay
Post date October 31, 2010
No Comments on Abstract Education: The Khan Academy

This site is truly amazing and could turn out to be one of the most important websites in the world. Abstract living at its finest. I urge everyone to share it with everyone they know.

Its a site with videos teaching educational concepts. It starts with simple concepts like 1+1 and goes all the way into college level and calculus.

The Khan Academy is helping people all around the world, giving them access to a free, first grade education.

www.khanacademy.org

Tags charity, education, Internet, motivation, People, Technology, Technology internet, video